Saturday, May 19, 2012
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The Mole

Monty_Mole_MSN_Avatar_by_silverhammerbro

I am THE MOLE and I live in a hole...


Disclaimer: Opinions expressed here are not those of Gwynfa C.C. or its officers, especially if you intend to sue. The webmaster undertakes to give the Mole any information provided by members of any camera club. The Mole for his part adopts the motto 'print and be damned'. Please note that any content of an explicit, malicious, damaging or offensive nature will be given extra special consideration. Politically correct disclaimer: Gwynfa Camera Club endeavours to ensure the accuracy of all information on this site but sadly 'The Mole' does not! All models over 18 years of age. No animals were harmed during the making of this website. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead, or events, past, present or future, is purely coincidental. Some names have been changed to protect the innocent and some others to protect the guilty. Batteries are not included. Slippery when wet. Parental guidance advised. Always read the label. If condition persists, consult your doctor. If rash, irritation, redness, or swelling develops, discontinue use. Contains scenes of extended peril and mild swearing. Thieves will be prosecuted. Please mind the gap between the website and the platform. Please remain seated until the web page has come to a complete stop. Do not use if under 5 foot 5 inches. May contain traces of nuts. If ingested, do not induce vomiting. If already vomiting, tough luck. Objects in rear-view mirror appear closer than they are. Driver does not carry cash. The chewing gum may lose it's flavour on the bedpost overnight. Does not affect your statutory rights. Other restrictions may apply in your territory but they are your problem. ...and remember, it's only a bit of fun!

The 'Word Under The Street' - All the latest rumours and gossip. Send your contibutions HERE.

It's NOT in Penarth Allan!

Written by Leigh Woolford
The Mole has asked us to remind Allan Squires that the BBQ this Thursday is at Ogmore beach, not at Penarth!

Allan at Ogmore Pier?

Written by Leigh Woolford
The Mole has heard that Allan Squires made a small error in direction when driving to the recent Gwynfa night at Penarth Pier. Seemingly he found himself at Ogmore by mistake. Asked to comment Allan said "I have a very long lens"! It seems he also has a rubbish Sat-Nav. The awful weather forecast restricted numbers to five and, of course, the weather turned out to be fine! Well done to those who turned up. Meanwhile, the rest of us were at the pub!

If I Had a Hammer

Written by The Mole
The Mole has heard that last week a certain silver haired person from the Beddau area visited the Stewart household with a manfrotto tripod which had not seen action for many a year. The tripod was all shiny and new looking but there was a problem - nothing could be attached to it due to the position of a small brass pin which would not budge. Before the three legged beast was thrown away it was given to Alec who placed his lens immediately onto the tripod and secured it in less than ten seconds to a chorus of how the *@*@*@** did you do that? Alec replied that he had simply released the security pin with the little lever and hey presto! The owner of said tripod said he had previously tried to remedy the problem by hitting it repeatedly with a hammer but nothing would budge. Oh dear! (All together now.... If I had a hammer I'd hammer in the morning I'd hammer in the evening... All over this tripod!)

Steve Littlewood is go!

Written by The Mole

The mole has it on good authority that Steve Littlewood took Alec Stewart on a trip to Gigrin Farm this week, the purpose being to snap the red kites.

Mr Stewart was apparently very pleased to be able to benefit from the 'branch of jessops' level of equipment that the aforementioned Mr. Littlewood had about his person. (Thunderbird 3 and Pod 5 was his camera and lens of choice we understand). Rumour has it that Mr Stewart made a valiant attempt to run off with a few lenses but couldn't get very far as they were three times his body weight.

Where am I?

Written by The Mole
Errrrm where is my nice cosy burrow gone? What is this new shiny place? I feel like I've been moved to a branch of Ikea.

The Mole - Beware, 'The Others' are Here

Written by The Mole
The Mole has discovered that this page is regularly visited by members of (takes deep breath) other camera clubs (or 'photographic societies' if they are from posh places!) Indeed, it is reported that on several recent occasions Gwynfa members have been asked the question 'who is The Mole?' This is unanswerable of course. The Mole is all things to all members and his sources willll never betray him (unless you offer them free beer).

The Mole - Most Viewed Photographs on this Site - Update

Written by The Mole
The Mole has noticed that the aforementioned mugshot of Gary Were has now romped ahead in the 'most viewed' stakes. He is now up to 248 views while Philippa's 'Obelisk, Pen y Fan' languishes in second place on 209 views. (For original article, scroll down....) Climbing the charts (with a bullet) into fourth place is that one with the see through monks and the ball bearings! (It gets everywhere!!)

The Mole - Singalonga Gwynfa Volume 1

Written by The Mole

The Mole made a rare visit to the pub last Thursday evening. It started out like any other post Gwynfa evening at the pub. However it ended with many of the regulars backing out of the door and some very worried locals asking Sian from behind the bar if she had 'spiked' the camera club! The proverbial blue touch paper was lit by a conversation about certain foundation garments which in turn led to an old joke about the rawhide bra (for those not familiar with this old joke, it "heads 'em up and moves 'em out"). At this point, someone who shall remain nameless (but was in fact Jeff) started singing "Rolling rolling rolling .....". And everyone joined in for a full rendition of 'Rawhide'.

This moment sparked what can only be described as 'Singalonga-Gwynfa Volume 1' with song after song being trotted out. At this point dear old Moley feels like he should be in one of those Ronco adverts on TV which says.... "hear such classics as"... 'Dedicated To The One I Love', 'Speedy Gonzales', 'Summer Nights' (complete with 'wella wella wella OOO'), 'Hey Jude', 'Zippardy Doo Dah' (Heidis' speciality), 'Delilah', 'Don't Dilly Dally' and many, many more.... (but not by the original artists).
When the repertoire became a little exhausted it degenerated into that old army song which has the chorus 'Did you ever see such a funny thing before'. Dennis came to the fore at this point and the Mole remembers something about Uncle Mike, a Motorbike and riding around the Gower... but it all became a bit of a blur about this time...
To the casual observer it seems that knowing the lyrics was optional. For example 'Hey Jude' contained a lot of confusion about whether we were 'making it bad' or indeed 'sad' or if we were letting her 'under our skin' or 'into our heart'. The song was cut short (mercifully) by the ensemble going into "Better better better better better better, ohhhhh" straight after the first verse. It of course ended with a rousing naaaaa na na nanan naaaaaaaa crescendo (as everyone knew the words to that bit), the section being enlivened by a particularly energetic 'Judeee judeeee judeee judeeee awwwww' by Jeff and Sheila. 
Talking of Jeff, he also on several occasions found the need to leap to his feet and do a frankly hysterical little 'cockney thumbs in braces' jig... particularly to 'My old man said follow the van'.  (What is a cock linnet anyway?)  Also particularly enjoyable was his rendition of the intro to Speedy Gonzales... Laaaaaaaaa, lala lala lala laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa....
All in all the Mole found it very entertaining but sadly no one had a video camera. We still don't know what they put in the drinks!

If you remember a particular classic not mentioned here, please tell the Mole. His memory isn't what it once was.

The Mole - Most Viewed Photographs on this Site

Written by The Mole
The Mole has been looking to see which are the most viewed photographs on this site. The results are odd. In fifth place with 160 views is Philipa Wood with 'All Alone Am I'. Fourth with 168 views is 'Shropshire Blue & Stilton' by Mostyn Davies. Third with 176 views is 'Early Morning Mist on the Teifi' by Maggie Parry-Jones. Second with 208 views is Philippa Wood (again) with 'Obelisk, Pen y Fan'. All quite normal so far... but here is where it gets odd. The most viewed photograph on the website is Gary Were's Mugshot with 209 views (at the time of typing). Obviously the illustrious Mr. Were has a more than a few admirers! Such magnetism begs the question, how much would his mugshot score in a monthly? (NB. Everyone can check to see the most viewed photographs by clicking on (wait for it) "Most Viewed" at the top of the home page).

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